When I Was a Kid I Tried Out for Little League

by Guy M. McBride, Ph.D.

When I was a kid I tried out for Little League. They said that they would have taken me but I couldn’t hit and I couldn’t catch.

And some of the mean players said I threw like a girl. I hated baseball.

Fast forward. I dated a young woman who liked sports. I mentioned one night that baseball was very boring.

She said, “You can’t say that.”

I said, “I can too say that.” She never dated me again. I hated baseball.

But this summer the canine club where I take my dog to socialize with other dogs closed early. I asked why. Someone had given all the staff members tickets to a Crawdads afternoon baseball game. When I picked up my Carly several days later, a really pretty young woman brought her out.

I asked, “Did you have a good time at the game?”

She replied, “Oh, I had a wonderful time.”

Then I asked, “Did our side win?” She looked confused.

“I don’t know,” she said.

Baseball used to be about throwing, pitching, hitting, and catching. But times have changed. Now it’s about special nights like Star Wars Night and the Night of Horrible Promotions. Kids get to run the bases and chase the team mascot. You can buy your pet a ticket for a dollar. Hot dogs are a dollar. Free fireworks at night games, too.

Now that baseball isn’t about playing baseball any more I could get to like the sport. Especially craft beer Tuesdays. Although wine Wednesday is a close second.